


Harry Potter and the Attempted Invasion of the Daleks

by SaraStarchild



Series: Harry Potter and the Crack Universe [2]
Category: Doctor Who (2005), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Twilight Series - All Media Types
Genre: Bella is boring, Breaking the Fourth Wall, Crack, Daleks are attacking, F/M, Gen, Harry thinks Edward is Cedric, Nerdfighteria References, Snape uses italics, StarKid References, Tags Are Hard
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-05
Updated: 2020-08-01
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:01:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25095040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SaraStarchild/pseuds/SaraStarchild
Summary: Alice Cullen has a vision: the Volturi attacks London, sending the place in flames. She, Carlisle, Edward, and Jasper take the trip to London to try to figure out what's going on. Meanwhile, Harry Potter and his friends are buying supplies for their fifth year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry...I wrote this back in August of 2010.THIS IS A PREQUEL TO HARRY POTTER AND THE CRAPTASTIC POLYJUICE SCHEME! HOWEVER: IT CAN WORK AS A STANDALONE.
Relationships: Edward Cullen & Harry Potter, Edward Cullen/Bella Swan, Hermione Granger & Harry Potter & Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley
Series: Harry Potter and the Crack Universe [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1817482
Comments: 1





	1. Prologue.

**_August, 2009; Forks, Washington._ **

It was an average day in the Cullen home. Edward was playing the piano, Bella and Renesmee were reading, Carlisle and Esme were doing medical stuff, and Jasper and Emmett were playing air hockey, as Alice and Rosalie looked on. It was a peaceful day, as it had been the day before…and the day before that…and the day before that…and a few months before _that_ … It was a very _boring_ day.

It needed some excitement.

Like…

Alice gasped, having a vision. A very frightening vision. In moments, the entire family gathered around her. As soon as she was able to focus again, she looked at Carlisle.

“The Volturi,” she gasped. “They’re attacking in London. Everything’s destroyed…”

Carlisle mulled over her words for about 10 milliseconds before he spoke to the rest of the family.

“Well, we can’t let that happen now, can we?”

“But it’s London,” Emmett cut in. “Really far away from here.”

“It’s not really any of our concern, is it?” Rosalie asked, wanting to keep the peaceful day uneventful.

“If we don’t stop them in London they might come here. It’s our concern,” Esme explained.

“I guess a few of us will be taking a trip to London…” Carlisle decided.

“A few?” Esme and Bella repeated.

“It’s too dangerous for all of us to go – Alice saw flames,” Edward answered. “I agree with Carlisle – only a few of us should go – make it less threatening for them…”

“Edward, Alice, Jasper, let’s go," Carisle said, heading towards the door. “I need you three.”

Bella was stubborn, not seeing the danger in this situation at all.

“What? Wait – what about me?” she exclaimed.

Edward kissed her forehead to quiet her.

“He needs _us_ , love. And besides, you might start more trouble than we’re going to face. Stay with Renesmee.”

Bella sighed and kissed her husband.

“I’ll find a way to follow you,” she whispered as soon as their lips stopped touching.

“Don’t. Love you,” Edward said, kissing her again, kissing his daughter’s forehead, and then following Jasper, Alice, and Carlisle out.


	2. One.

**_One Week After The Prologue; Diagon Alley._ **

Harry Potter, Hermione Granger, and Ron, Fred, George, and Ginny Weasley were walking through the crowded streets of Diagon Alley.

“Look at the list we’ve got this year!” Ron exclaimed. “Ugh! They have books that are _specifically_ for the O.W.L.s!”

“Well, they’re important, Ron! Our O.W.L.s –” Hermione started, but Fred and George cut her off.

“‘Prepare us for the future –’” Fred started.

“‘– Lets us see our strengths and weaknesses –’” George continued.

“Blah, blah, blah,” they finished together.

“It’s all a load of rubbish,” Fred informed their fifth year friends. “ _We_ only got three O.W.L.s each –”

“Not surprising,” Hermione muttered, but the twins decided to ignore her.

“– and look at us! We’re fine! We’re going into our seventh year!” George continued.

“Seventh year,” Fred said dreamily, putting his arm around his twin’s shoulders. “McGonagall said we’d never make it. But look – we did.” He stopped and held his hand out to his brother, ready to shake. “Mister George Weasley, I congratulate you to making it to your seventh year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry!” he said in an authoritative yet fake voice.

“Thank you, Mister Fred Weasley,” George said in an equally authoritative yet fake voice, shaking his brother’s hand. “And _I_ congratulate _you_ on making it to _your_ seventh year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, as well!”

Fred brought him into a hug and they (as well as the rest of the group) started walking again.

“I never would have made it without you, George,” Fred chuckled.

“Ditto. Ah, Fred, what would I ever do without you?” George asked his brother, chuckling as well.

Harry was looking over his list, and trying to figure out exactly how much ink and parchment he would need, not only to complete all of his school work, but to write to his godfather, Sirius Black, as well. Yet, he _also_ had to keep in mind that Hedwig didn’t like searching for Sirius. If only he wasn’t homeless…

The next thing he knew, Ginny was walking alongside him.

“Hey,” she said.

“Hey,” Harry replied.

Ginny looked over his shoulder at the list of things he needed.

“Big list this year, huh?” she asked.

“Yep,” Harry nodded. “Hey, erm…if you need me to…I could buy you a few of the books you need – Ron won’t let me buy anything of his…–”

“Like you did my first year?” Ginny reminded him, giggling a bit.

“That was different!” Harry exclaimed, also laughing. “Lockhart gave me those for free – I didn’t want his free books!”

“Who does?” Ginny asked.

“Don’t look now but…” Harry lowered his voice. “…She’s right behind you.”

“Hermione?” Ginny laughed, yet keeping Hermione’s name quiet. “I thought she liked gingers, though!”

“That’s the thing, Ginny!” Harry exclaimed. “She does!”

They glanced behind them at Ron and Hermione. Hermione was going on about the O.W.L.’s to Ron, who was currently facepalming himself.

Laughing still, they turned back. Ginny, seeing something Harry hadn’t, pointed and waved.

“It’s Luna and Neville! Luna! Neville! Over here!”

Neville Longbottom, who was accompanied by a blonde girl Harry hadn’t met yet, ran over to the group.

“Are you guys getting your stuff? I already got mine –” He gestured to the trolley he had brought with him. “Gran said that she would be at the Leaky Cauldron, but I got lost… And then I found Luna –”

Luna waved and then shook Harry’s hand.

“I’m Luna Lovegood. And you’re Harry Potter.” She let go of Harry’s hand and looked at Ron and Hermione behind her. “And you’re Ron Weasley. And you’re Hermione Granger.” She then looked at Fred and George. “And you two are Fred and George Weasley.”

“Good one, young Padawan,” Fred said.

“We had _no_ idea what our names were,” George said.

“Yes, now can you tell which one is which?” Fred asked, gesturing to himself and George.

After a moment, Luna decided her answer.

“ _You’re_ Fred…” she said, pointing at one twin. “…and _you’re_ George…” she decided, pointing at the other.

Fred and George looked at each other, and then back to Luna. They then stepped around Ron, Hermione, Harry, and Ginny and stood directly in front of Luna.

“You said your name is Luna?” George asked.

“Yes. Luna Lovegood.”

“Well you’re a GENIUS!” Fred exclaimed, as they both took Luna’s hands and shook them. “ _Nobody’s_ got that right before!”

“ _Nobody!_ ” George repeated.

“Not even Lee Jordan!” Fred went on.

“And he’s our best friend!” George added.

“If anyone would get that right, it’s him!” Fred finished, yet they both continued to shake Luna’s hands.

Hermione looked at Neville.

“You said you’re lost?” she asked.

“Yes – Gran’s at the Leaky Cauldron – I’ve forgotten where it is –”

“Well, stick with us, Neville,” Harry suggested. “Let us get our stuff, and then we’ll bring you to the Leaky Cauldron.”

“O-okay. Thanks, you guys,” Neville smiled.

“Anytime, Neville,” Ron said.

As soon as Fred and George stopped shaking Luna’s hands, the troop set off to buy their school supplies, and then to find Neville’s grandmother.

* * *

“Mum!” Ron called to his mother from across the street. Molly Weasley was with her husband, Arthur Weasley, on their way to Florean Fortescue's Ice Cream Parlour. “We’re bringing Neville back to his grandmother at the Leaky Cauldron!”

“But we were just going to get you kids!” she called back. “We were just going to get some ice cream! Neville can come, too!”

Fred and George looked at each other.

“Ice cream?! We _love_ ice cream!” they exclaimed, and raced across the street. Ginny, who was also fond of ice cream, followed them without a backward glance.

Ron looked at Neville.

“I’m probably late as it is – I really would like to go, though…if I could…”

Ron turned back to his mother.

“He can’t! We’ll meet up with you after!” Ron called, and then he, Hermione, Harry, Luna, and Neville all started on their way to the Leaky Cauldron.

And Hermione went on and on about the O.W.L.s…

“Gran says that if I don’t get enough she’ll disown me…” Neville said suddenly, cutting her off.

“I’m sure she was just kidding, Neville,” Harry assured him. “Your grandmother isn’t the type of person who would disown her own grandson…”

“Why don’t you live with your parents, Neville? – ow!” Ron asked, before Harry was able to elbow him in the ribs. Ron looked at him. “What?!” he mouthed.

Harry shook his head with a look of extreme warning on his face.

“They…I…We…” Neville tried to start several sentences, and then settled with, “I don’t like to talk about it.”

“My mother died when I was nine,” Luna contributed her part into the conversation.

“How did that happen?” Hermione asked.

“She liked to experiment with spells. It killed her in the end…” She looked at Harry. “Have you ever seen a Thestral, Harry?”

“Erm…No…I haven’t, actually… Do I want to?”

“No one ever really gets a choice…but they’re fascinating creatures, really…” She looked up, suddenly distracted. “Is that a Dabberblimp?” she asked, pointing.

Everyone looked except for Hermione. She crossed her arms and stared at Luna incredulously.

“I’ve never heard of a Dabberblimp. Come to think of it, I’ve never heard of a Thestral, either,” Hermione informed her.

“You read a lot, don’t you?” Luna asked.

“Yes,” Hermione answered.

“Have you ever read _The Quibbler_?” she asked.

“Erm…no, I haven’t…” Hermione said slowly.

“You should. It’s very informative,” Luna suggested, smiling sweetly.

By the look on her face, it was obvious that Hermione was a little confused by Luna’s words, and her entire being in general, but she nodded slowly anyway.

“O-okay…I’ll get right on that…” she said slowly.

“Daddy’s probably at Slug & Jiggers Apothecary – we can see if he has the latest issue after we bring Neville to his grandmother.”

“Yeah, okay,” Hermione agreed, yet her words were dripping with uncertainty.

“Hey!” Ron said, pointing ahead. “It’s the Leaky Cauldron!” he announced, and everyone quickened their pace to the Leaky Cauldron.

When they got inside, Neville looked for his grandmother. Not ever meeting her in their lives and therefore having no idea what she looked like (the only detail Harry could remember was the fact that she carried a red handbag, which Neville had announced to the class just before he had faced a Boggart in third year), so they let Neville look. Suddenly, he turned back to them.

“She’s not in here,” he said, panicked. “She said she’d be here. What if she’s _so_ confident that I won’t get enough O.W.L.s and disowned me _already?!_ ”

“Calm down, Neville,” Harry said.

“Let’s look outside,” Luna said, already skipping towards the door. Harry, Hermione, Ron, and a panicking Neville followed her out.

“Don’t worry, Neville,” Ron assured his friend.

“Watch, she’ll be just outside –” Hermione said, opening the door for him.

As soon as they were all out of the Leaky Cauldron, they all looked up and down the street they were on. There was no sign of Neville’s Grandmother.

“Are you sure she said she’d be here?” Harry asked.

“Yes!” Neville, who was close to tears at this point, said.

“You didn’t get here by Floo Powder?” Ron asked.

“I can’t! I’m allergic!” he cried.

“Right…” Ron said, looking away awkwardly.

“Well, she can’t have gotten far…” Hermione said, as the door to the Leaky Cauldron opened.

An old woman in a long green dress, wearing a tall hat with a stuffed vulture on top and a fur-fox scarf, and carrying a big red handbag walked out of the pub.

Augusta Longbottom looked down at her grandson, who was wiping his tears at the sight of her.

“Gran! I thought you disowned me!” Neville cried.

“Neville! I was in the _bathroom!_ ” Mrs. Longbottom said, half-heartedly hugging her grandson. “And you _knew_ I was kidding about that! Ugh, Neville, you’re being ridiculous!” she sighed.

“I’m sorry, Gran…” Neville said, sniffling a bit.

“It’s alright,” she sighed reluctantly after a moment. She then looked at Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Luna. “Thanks for bringing him back – I figured he must have gotten lost – I was about to go fetch him… Mister Potter, what are you looking at?” she asked Harry, for he was looking at something that was just to the left of Mrs. Longbottom’s shoulder.

Four figures were walking down the street towards them – it looked like an adult and three teenagers. Harry didn’t recognize the adult and two of the teenagers, but one… It seemed impossible, but…

Harry broke out into a run, and the entire group followed him.

He sprinted head-long to that one teenager, calling his name as he went.

“Cedric! CEDRIC!”


	3. Two.

_A Few Minutes Before Chapter One Ended; London, England._

After a week in London and no sign of the Volturi, the Cullens were getting tense. Jasper kept on trying to calm things down, but sometimes vampire powers weren’t enough. So, they decided to take a walk around, to see if the Volturi were anywhere.

It was a dark, drizzly day, so they didn’t have to worry about themselves sparkling in the sun. They all walked up the street. Alice was dancing ahead, watching everything.

“It’s close,” she announced at one point. Edward looked into her mind. The exact place of attack was just a few streets down. “It’s _really_ close.”

“Edward, scope the minds,” Carlisle ordered. “Any vampires?”

There was a moment of silence among the Cullens.

“None,” Edward said finally.

“We should go anyway,” Jasper decided. “I mean, we’re already here, and Alice could give us a play-by-play of what’s going to happen…”

“I agree,” Carlisle nodded.

Suddenly, there was a shout from further down the street. Shouts of…

“Cedric! CEDRIC!”

A group of teenagers and an old woman came running towards them. A guy with untidy black hair, glasses, and a funny little scar on his forehead lead the way. He was the one yelling.

“Cedric! Cedric!”

Edward quickly got himself into the black-haired teenager’s head as he came closer.

_It’sCedricIcan’tbelieveitIthoughtitwasimpossiblebutit’shimhe’saliveOHMYWIZARDGODIT’SCEDRICDIGGORY!!!_

“CEDRIC!”

And then, the teenager tackled Edward in the biggest hug he had ever received, yelling “CEDRIC!” into his chest.

“Who?” the Cullens asked.

The guy took a step back.

“It’s me! It’s Harry Potter! Don’t you remember?! You and I were in the graveyard! Voldemort – Voldemort killed you but you’re HERE!” he exclaimed, hugging him again. “You’re alive!”

Edward looked at Carlisle, confused. Who was Harry Potter? What was a Voldemort? He looked back at Harry.

“Erm…I’m sorry, but…I have no idea who you’re talking about…”

Harry let go of him.

“You’re…you’re Cedric. Cedric Diggory. You were in your seventh year at Hogwarts last year. You were in the Triwizard Tournament. You – We were in the maze together. We went to the graveyard together. The cup was a Portkey – you were the one who figured it out! Lord Voldemort came out and he killed you –” Harry then fully comprehended the confused expression on Edward’s face. “You really don’t remember…?” he asked quietly.

“I’ve never seen you once in my entire life,” Edward informed him.

Harry took exactly three steps back and looked down at his feet, avoiding Edward’s eyes.

“Alright. Sorry. I just…Sorry,” he turned around and started to walk away. “Let’s go, guys,” Harry instructed his friends, and they turned way, too.

“Wait.” Everyone’s eyes were then on Alice Cullen. She looked at Harry. “Come back,” Harry took a step closer to the Cullens, and Alice had a vision. Edward looked into her mind and saw a new vision – London was in peace, just as it was today. Alice focused back to Harry. “Can you step away again?” Harry obeyed, and Alice had another vision. Edward again read her mind to find the vision she had that had brought them all here – London in flames. Again, Alice focused on Harry. “Okay, now _really_ come back.”

“Oh my…no…” Edward whispered. Jasper and Carlisle looked back and forth between Alice and Edward.

“What is it?” Carlisle asked.

“What’s going on?” Jasper asked. He looked at his wife. “Alice?”

Alice pointed at the group.

“We need you guys to help us save London.”

There was a moment of confused silence. And then, an uproar from Harry Potter and the rest of the group.

“ _Save_ London?!” a red-haired boy with freckles asked.

“London’s _fine_ , though!” the old woman exclaimed.

“Why do we need to save London?” a boy who looked related to the old woman asked.

“We don’t even _know_ who you _are_!” a smart-looking girl with brown, curly hair exclaimed. “I mean, if you aren’t Cedric –” she went on, looking at Edward.

“Right,” Carlisle said, stepping forward. “Where are our manners – we haven’t even introduced ourselves!” He held out his hand towards the girl. “I’m Carlisle Cullen –” he said as she shook his hand. Then he went on to shake the others’ hands.

Alice then stepped forward and shook the girl’s hand.

“Hi. Alice Cullen –” Alice said, going on to the next person, and Jasper took her hand.

“Jasper Hale.” And he went on…

Edward just stood, his eyes transfixed to Harry’s.

“Edward,” he said slowly, as if talking to someone stupid. “Edward. Anthony. Masen. Cullen.” He then gave him a look that said, “and I am _not_ going to be whoever you say I am.”

“That’s a pretty long name, Edward Anthony Masen Cullen,” Harry said, stepping up to him. “Can I call you Eddy?”

“No.”

“Cedward?”

“No.”

Harry then took Edward’s hand in his and started to shake his hand.

“Excellent. Cedric it is.” He let go and took a step back. “I am Harry Potter, aka The Boy Who Lived, but you may call me Harry.” He turned to his group and started pointing out its members. “That’s my best friend Ron Weasley –” He pointed to the redhead. “That’s my other best friend Hermione Granger –” He pointed to the curly-haired brunette. “That’s a very good friend of mine, Neville Longbottom, and his grandmother, Mrs. Longbottom –” He pointed at the boy and his grandmother. “And that’s a girl I just met by the name of Luna Lovegood.” Harry concluded, pointing at a distracted-looking blonde girl who hadn’t spoken. He looked at Edward. “But you would probably know all of this already, wouldn’t you, Cedric?”

“No, I wouldn’t, actually, seeing as _I’m. Not. Cedric,_ ” Edward growled the last bit of the sentence.

“Of course not.” Harry turned to Carlisle. “What was that about London? What’s going on?” he asked him.

“It’s going to be attacked,” Alice said. “I saw it. I’m psychic, you see…”

“Psychic?” Mrs. Longbottom repeated. “What are you?” she asked. “You don’t look like a Seer!”

“Oh, sorry –” Carlisle said. “We’re kind of vampires…” he revealed.

“‘ _Kind of_ vampires’?!” Hermione repeated. “How can you be ‘ _kind of_ _vampires_ ’?!”

“Yeah… Take that back; we are _completely_ vampires,” Carlisle corrected himself. “But don’t worry – we won’t eat you!” he added quickly, catching the sight of the group’s panicked faces…well, the group minus Luna’s faces… “You see, we’re vegetarians! Well, kind of… We don’t drink humans’ blood; we drink animals’!”

“And you can’t tell anyone,” Jasper added. “No one’s supposed to know – we’ll get into trouble if you say anything…”

“How can we trust you?” Mrs. Longbottom asked.

“I believe them,” Luna spoke for the first time. She spoke in a soft, yet somewhat distracted, voice. “I think we should help them save London.”

Harry nodded.

“I agree with Luna. We should help Cedric and his new vampire friends.”

Ron nodded in agreement.

“What’s going on?” Hermione asked. “What can we do?”

“Well you see…” Alice started, trying to find the best way to explain the situation. “…there are these vampires by the name of the Volturi –”

“The _what?_ ” Hermione cut her off.

“How do you even _pronounce_ that?” Ron asked.

“Just listen to her,” Jasper ordered.

“They live in Italy and they’re the…they’re kind of the rulers of vampire-kind. I mean, they’re like, evil overlords. Black cloaks and pale skin and everything. But a week ago, I had a vision about them attacking London, just a few streets down, and –”

“The Vote –” Harry tried to pronounce the name.

“The Volturi,” Edward corrected him.

“The Vontruni –” He tried again.

“The Volturi,” Edward corrected him again.

“The whatever –” Harry looked at Edward, seeing if he was going to try to correct him again. When he understood that he wasn’t, he looked back at Alice. “– The Whatever are in Italy. Are you sure you didn’t see _Death Eaters_ attacking?”

“Death Eaters?” Carlisle and Alice repeated.

“What are Death Eaters?” Edward asked.

“Do they eat death?” Jasper asked. “Is that even _possible?_ ”

Harry turned to Ron and pointed to him in an “I told you so” kind of way.

“How many times did I tell you that that was a stupid name?” he asked, also in an “I told you so” kind of way.

“A lot,” Ron answered, smiling.

Harry turned back to Alice. He opened his mouth to answer but then another person’s voice came out.

“They’re evil.” Everyone looked at Neville. “They don’t _eat_ death; they create it.”

“They work for the man who killed my parents,” Harry added, looking down at his feet again.

“Who killed your parents?” Edward asked. Harry met his eyes.

“The same person who killed you, Cedric. Lord Voldemort,” Harry said. “The Death Eaters work for Voldemort.”

“Are you sure you didn’t see _them_ attacking London?” Hermione asked Alice. “Are you sure you didn’t see the Death Eaters and mistook them for the Von-turn-ay?” she asked.

“No, it was the Volturi,” Alice said.

“Wait, I got this,” Harry looked at Alice. “Did they wear…masks?” he asked dramatically. Alice stared at him blankly.

“…No,” she answered. Harry was instantly deflated.

“Oh. Okay, then.”

There was a moment of awkward silence before Ron spoke.

“But the Venividivici are in Italy, though,” he started. “What do they want with London?”

“I think we should go and see if we can figure it out,” Luna said.

Everyone nodded in agreement, except for Mrs. Longbottom.

“As much as I would love to go, I’m expecting a visit from Mabel, and –”

“Can I go with them, Gran?” Neville asked. “I won’t die, I promise! And I’ll get enough O.W.L.s so you won’t disown me! And I won’t have any panic attacks!”

“I wouldn’t count on that last one,” Mrs. Longbottom contradicted him. “But I suppose you can stay. Mister Potter, watch him.”

“I will, Mrs. Longbottom,” Harry assured her.

“Alright, then,” she looked back at Neville. “Contact me by owl if you need me. Ciao!” she exclaimed, and with a _pop_ , she vanished. The Cullens stared after her.

“What did she just –” Jasper asked.

“Oh, she just Disapparated,” Neville started. “It’s nothing to worry about – she’s home now. She kinda forgets not to do that in mixed company…–”

“We’re wizards –” Harry started.

“And witches!” Hermione added, gesturing to herself and Luna. Harry turned to her and waved her off.

“Did we mention that?” Harry asked, turning back to the Cullens.

“No,” All four vampires said.

“Oh. Well…we are,” Harry said a bit awkwardly.

“Surprise!” Ron said, just as awkwardly.

“But no one’s supposed to know about that, either,” Harry said, looking at Carlisle. “So we would greatly appreciate it if you guys didn’t go spreading it around…”

“We won’t say anything about the fact that you’re wizards and witches if you don’t say anything about the fact that we’re vampires. Deal?” Edward asked, holding out his hand for Harry to shake.

“Deal,” Harry said, shaking his hand. “Even though you should already know about the fact we’re wizards and witches, Cedric.”

“But I’m not –”

“Alright, then,” Alice said, speaking over him. “Let’s go!” she exclaimed, starting to walk down the street again. Everyone followed.

In a few minutes, they had reached the street that Alice had seen.


End file.
